Aphorisms
I love aphorisms and proverbs. When I read a text, any text, my ear is eager for the punchy, the mysterious, the surprising, the true. I mark these statements, copy them down, and organize them by topic. I can’t help it. I’m addicted to these little nuggets of wit.
Aphorisms don’t always offer new ideas. But they express ideas, new or old, in a fresh way. They are generally brief and memorable. Sometimes they contain wisdom. Sometimes they are funny or satirical. Sometimes they are apt articulations of everyday life.
Since I was a teenager, I’ve tried my hand at writing aphorisms. There are worse pastimes. If you’ve never come up with a proverb of your own, I highly recommend it. But be warned, it’s hard to stop at just one.
Below are some aphorisms I’ve come up with over the years. I’m not saying these are wise or funny or apt. I hope you find some of them so. I’m just not really sure what to do with all these aphorisms except share them with you. None of you asked, and I delivered. Enjoy!
From My High School Years
They lack the factories but still get the pollution.
- this is from a song that I wrote, of which I remember nothing else
Revolution begins with vocabulary.
- The first term to define is “enemy.”
Short Aphorisms
You can’t eat your way out of a stomachache.
Drums aren’t loud to the percussionist.
Don’t let certainty smother curiosity.
Arrogance will only get you to the edge of your insecurity.
Sometimes it takes courage to accept the cure.
Safety and peace are only this war away!
Everyone’s having yard sales and no one’s buying.
Melting icecaps lift all boats.
You can’t outwit the weather.
Euphemism covers a multitude of sins.
Give to the landfill what is the landfill’s.
Doubt nourishes faith.
If you make a mess, make amends.
You cannot be perfect until you accept imperfection.
Of the bursting of old wineskins there is no end.
Not everything true is written down.
Cliché used to be more original.
Wisdom is earned uphill, enjoyed downhill.
If a trap cannot be hidden, make it attractive.
A lazy cat is still a threat to the birds.
New ideas bloom on old paths; old ideas on new.
Wealth is not the measure of God’s blessing.
Tomorrow begins with tonight’s sleep.
Treasure can be buried anywhere.
Lack is heavier than gold.
Just because it rhymes doesn’t mean that it’s true.
Be humble or be humbled.
Haven’t doesn’t mean can’t.
Having a right does not make it right.
Sometimes gratitude can sound like boasting.
Longer Ones
What you call its great weakness, its major flaw, is actually its great strength and the purpose for which it was created.
- on plastic wrap sticking to itself and not the dish
Sure, you’ve got God behind you—ready to hit you upside the head!
The antichrist is more likely to be the person you voted for than the person you voted against.
When a President leaves the White House, they finally get to retire from being the Antichrist.
I don’t have to be someone else for God to work through me.
I don’t doubt the truth; I doubt my ability to understand the truth fully.
Some people think the solution to global warming is more powerful air conditioning.
Even if you’re unprepared, you can still find success.
Dear God, this prayer is gonna blow your mind…
My life is a series of preparations that look like frustrations.
Is it ironic for a picture of a tree to be on the cover of a book?
God laughs when you walk through a gnat cloud.
A wise person hovers over each question like a hen over her eggs, knowing at any point they could crack open with life or death. A fool seeks only answers.
A sinner who stops sinning is considered wise, as is a sinner who stops confessing.
When wealth disappears, so does the appearance of wisdom.
Just because I notice the problem doesn’t mean I’m part of the solution.
At the end of my life, I want it to be said of me, “He shows promise.”
A subway map makes crooked paths straight.
Sometimes growth involves removal.
Interesting questions will take you further than right answers.
Beware the leader who boasts of ends but hides means.
Before you can be a voice for the voiceless, you must be an ear for the silenced.
Upholding an oppressive system is sometimes called piety.
When a dump truck full of gold hits a pothole and a single coin bounces out, that is sometimes called generosity.
Faith as small as a mustard seed—or a fleet of bulldozers—can move a mountain.
Aphorisms About Writing
If you can’t write what you want to write, write something different.
A poem is a jar always spilling.
Writing something stupid is better than not writing at all. Who knows what might prove useful later on?
Thanks for reading. Feel free to send me your own homemade aphorisms!